Meeting offline

related links

1. Netmate dos and don'ts
2. Make friends online
3. Meeting offline
4. Cybersnooping

"The internet is a haven for people to hide their identity, and be someone they are not," says 18 year-old Eddie. "The world is a scary place and not everybody is who they say they are on the net. Just be careful, meet him with some of your friends in a crowded place so lots of people can see you!"

Arranging a meeting

Try to have several telephone conversations or exchanges of letters so that you know a little more about each other before you meet. Start off with email or instant chat. You should arrange your first meeting in a public place during daylight hours, e.g. afternoon coffee or a quick lunchtime drink. Try to take someone with you, arrange a signal beforehand so that if you don't want to stay, you can make your excuses and leave safely.

Don't invite them to your home/go to their home for the first meeting and don't accept a lift to or from the date - make your own way there and back. Don't allow yourself to be picked up for the first meeting. If you don't have your own transport, get a friend to give you a lift, or get a cab/bus.

The first meeting

Do:

• Let someone know where you are going, who you are meeting, and what time you expect to be home. Make sure you have your mobile;
• Be yourself - don't pretend to be something you're not;
• Be aware of your surroundings, take note of important landmarks such as where the nearest telephone is if you lose your mobile;
• Be polite if you decide you don't want to meet up again. Don't promise you'll ring if you have no intention of doing so.

Don't:

• Leave your wallet/ purse unattended as it contains personal information, and your car and house keys;
• Leave your drink unattended. If you have to go to the loo take your drink with you or order a new one when you return. Unfortunately date rape does happen. On the same note don't drink too much, even though you are nervous, as you may do or say something you'll later regret such as vomit over their shoes. You will also make yourself more vulnerable, keep a clearer head until you know them better.